


Goodnight

by VeryImportantDemon



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Love Letters, River writing a letter, goodbye letters
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-25
Updated: 2015-12-25
Packaged: 2018-05-09 09:01:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 787
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5534000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VeryImportantDemon/pseuds/VeryImportantDemon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>River Song wants to say goodbye, the real, final goodbye, but she cannot bring herself to do it to his face.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goodnight

**Author's Note:**

> This is posted today, on Christmas, in honor of The Husbands of River Song and my actual queen returning. I found the file deep in the drafts of my email. Hope you enjoy it, because for some reason I really like writing letters.

_Dear Sweetie,_

_I hope you don’t get this too soon. I trust her judgment. She is your best friend, even after all these long years, your TARDIS. She hasn’t left you; she’s stayed by your side, after all this time. Always, it’s the two of you. I wasn’t even supposed to exist. I wasn’t supposed to meet you. But I did. I’m sorry about that, what I did when we met. I didn’t mean it. I didn’t love you, then. I fell into love, I would say - into love with you. It was a different sensation. I’ve never been in love before. You were my life, my love, my only, and that’s one thing that won’t change, even when I’m gone._

_Love is strange feeling. What is love? Surely you would know, as you are mine, and I’m yours. I never did believe in true love as a little girl. Love is strange in the way you do things for each other. Sort of like the way you used to bring me bright yellow flowers when it was dark and stormy, or when I’d had a bad day. Love is when I sat through your scattered ramblings and agreed with you because they made you happy. Love is when you’ll do anything for your significant other, putting their needs miles ahead of your own. Love is those times when you came at my every call, even when it was only a few words. Love is when I would wake up, a frightened young girl, screaming that the spaceman was coming to get me, and you would comfort me, get me a nice cup of tea, and not mention it in the morning. Love is, in short, what I feel for you._

_I’m getting off topic. That’s not the point of this letter, to tell you what love is. The point of this letter, my love, is for me to tell you goodbye. I told you goodbye, already, when we parted, but of course, enough is never enough. I love so dearly that our parting words weren’t enough. I knew when we married first that you would out live me. You always were different, the man that came from the stars. I saw them in your eyes, the stars. They sparkle when you smile. They get a million times brighter when you talk about something you’re passionate about, my love. And I don’t want to be the last one to see that sparkle._

_You have such a long, long life ahead of you, and I don’t want you to spend those years alone, love. I want you to find someone else, another man or a woman or an alien, someone, to love. I want you to love whoever that turns out to be almost as much as you loved me, but not quite as much, because I am selfish, my love. Even though I’m gone, I still want a part of your hearts for myself, a part for my own love that I gave you. I’m selfish, love. I’m human. But you are not. You are more._

_Find that person, sweetie. Go out and find them. Don’t pick someone that reminds you of me. Don’t do that to yourself. I don’t want you to think of me too often that being with this person makes you sad when you should be happy. I want you to be happy, above all, Doctor. Please be happy. Will you do that for me? Be happy._

_I’m going to get to sappy if I keep on going with this, my love. But I must. There are a few more things left to say._

_Thank you. Thank you. A million times, my love, thank you, for everything you did for me. Thank you for saving me, time and time again. Thank you for teaching me to love. Thank you for helping me to find my family. Thank you for being my family. Thank you, love, so very much._

_I am running out of time, and I don’t want to make you too sad whenever you read this letter, but I must ask you one more thing._

_Melody Pond. When you meet her, if you haven’t already, please, Doctor – tell her a story. Tell her that she will be great. Tell her that she will be wonderful. Tell her that she’ll meet her parents and she’ll make friends across the stars, and tell her that someday, she’ll become one. Tell her, my love, that she will learn to love._

_Don’t forget what I said. Be happy, my love, when I am gone, but my last words to you here have to be this. Goodbye, my love, my sweetie. And goodnight._

_Love,_

_Professor River Song_


End file.
